


A Novel Idea

by wanderlustfaery (etherealprey)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Post Hogwarts, after the war, past relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-31
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-07-05 03:29:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15855312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/etherealprey/pseuds/wanderlustfaery
Summary: Hermione finds in a muggle bookstore a novel about her relationship with Draco in Hogwarts. Angry that Draco would write a book about them she goes to confront him, about it, except things aren't exactly what they seem.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> i got this idea from another fandom and just ran with it. No beta.

Hermione browsed the books in the muggle bookstore she was in. She loved reading about magic in wizarding books, but sometimes she just wanted to read a good mystery or science fiction. She paused when she saw a rather large sign by the information desk. They were having a book signing for an author, but the image on the sign is what caught her attention. It was a brunette with voluminous brown curly hair and brown eyes holding a wand in her hand. Standing behind her was a blonde man with grey eyes holding a wand as well. Their sleeves were rolled up and you could clearly see a snake with a skull tattoo on the forearm of the man. And then on the girl the word mudblood was carved in her arm. The man had his arm around the girl around the waist. They were surrounded by magic it appeared. Hermione gasped when she realized it was her and Draco.  
“Oh, you see we have a book signing” the bookstore worker said  
“Um yeah” Hermione replied  
Hermione glanced down at the nametag of the worker. Hope.  
“This one is a very good one. It’s been on the bestsellers list for weeks. There’s supposed to be a trilogy, and I can’t wait for the next one” Hope said  
“Next one?”  
“Yes, after the first one, everyone was hooked. I can’t blame them. I loved this one. It’s so well written, and it’s not the same boring supernatural genre either where they just focus on vampires. This one is about wizards and witches, and dragons, and werewolves and so much more!”  
“You don’t say? Do you happen to have a copy?”  
“Oh yes, they’re right in the front when you walk in. I’m surprised you didn’t see it”  
“I’m more of a mystery person than fantasy”  
“It’s not just that, it’s got romance, adventure, and some steamy hot scenes in it. Wizards really do like to get it on”  
Hermione had to bite the inside of her cheek to keep from shrieking. Hope led her to the front of the store where she handed her a copy of the book. Hermione opened the book flipped through the pages. She quickly scanned one of the pages, as her eyes went wide at what she read.

 _The bushy haired know it all swot, Hermione sat there in potions class raising her hand at every question. A spell missed it’s intended target and hit her square in the face, rather mouth. Her front teeth were enlarged to the size of beaver. She cried as the children laughed. The potions teacher was already annoyed and commanded silence._  
 _“What seems to be the problem?” Snape asked_  
 _“Look at her teeth! Look at what they’ve done to her!” Ron yelled_  
 _“They look the same as before. Now class turn to page 274”_  
 _Hermione cried too ashamed to leave, but humiliated at the same time. Draco handed her a silk handkerchief._  
 _“Don’t cry princess. They’ll only use it against you”_  
  
Hermione quickly flipped further into the book. She was about to scream at what was written. Draco had gone to the astronomy tower to kill the headmaster. Hermione appeared and begged him to stop. That he didn’t have to do this. Draco cried, stating he didn’t have a choice. He never had a choice, and that his mother would be killed if he didn’t do this. Unable to do anything else Hermione kisses him, long enough to distract him. She takes his wand. He accios for his wand back, but another wand flies into his hand. It’s the headmaster’s wand. The death eaters approach and Hermione holds the wand against Draco’s head in a threatening manor. She says something terribly cliche and apparates away. Then the two have sex. Steamy hot sex for about 3 pages.  
“That never happened! None of this happened!”  
Hermione threw the book onto the table. Everyone in the bookstore was looking at her. She looked at the author of the book. Darius Mitchell. DM. That pointy faced pale ferret wrote about their relationship for the entire world to see. Rather the muggle world, in an attempt to get back at her for breaking things off. She knew he was petty at times, but this was too much. She couldn’t believe that he would do this. She walked out of the bookstore and into a nearby alley and apparated home. She screamed out of anger so loudly that Crookshanks ran from the room. She threw her bags down and then took her wand out. She apparated to his flat to find him. He hadn’t changed the wards and she landed in his living room.  
“Pointy faced ferret! Where are you?!” Hermione yelled

Blaise walked into Gringotts. He had a little extra pep in his step as he walked to his vault. Since he and his family didn’t actively participate in the war, and took no sides, they were spared from having to pay any reparations. But since his mother was now on her 9th or 10th husband, people began to get suspicious. Blaise had to think about himself, and how he would survive. So did the only thing he could think of. Who know people would love to read about Draco and Hermione’s forbidden love story. He wasn’t exactly breaking any rules, since it was a work of fiction. He was already working on the sequel. Since their breakup, Draco whined incessantly to Blaise about everything. And Blaise wrote it all down, he embellished here and there, and made it much more smutty and appealing to readers. And instead of having them break up at the end of the trilogy, he would give them the happy ending they never got. Or would he? He could push for a 4th book.

“Granger! What the hell is wrong with you!?” Draco yelled as he ducked  
“You stupid pale faced git! How could you?!” Hermione yelled as she threw the vase at him  
Theo walked through the floo and saw the two of them fighting.  
“Are we doing this again? Are you together but not together? I can come back later” Theo said  
Draco rushed over and hid behind Theo.  
“She’s mad! Absolutely mad!” Draco said  
“I sensed that” Theo said


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They find out who really wrote the book.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> no beta. thanks for reading.

Theo was reading the book, while Hermione was pacing back and forth. Draco was leaning against the wall, deep in thought.   
“Honestly, did you two really shag this much?” Theo asked  
They both glared at him.   
“Honestly, the writer’s spent 4 pages of on you shagging each other other. This is the 5th time they’ve had sex in this book. It’s a miracle anything else happens in this book” Theo said  
“None of it is true! None of that ever happened!” Hermione yelled  
“I’ve walked in on the both of you-” Theo started to say  
“That was after! It wasn’t in school!” Hermione said  
“Though I like how they moved Potter to the background, where he’s just running around and not really part of the story” Theo noted  
“That part I did like” Draco said  
“I’m so glad you’re amused by this” Hermione said  
“I didn’t write this. I told you, it’s-” Draco said  
“Beneath you to write for muggles, I know. The sentence structure is terrible. And my hair is not white, it’s a very light blonde. I do not have pointy features, they are sharp and angled and blah blah blah blah” Hermione imitated in his voice  
“I didn’t write this. You obviously didn’t write this. Theo didn’t write this. So who’s left? I doubt Potter or the Weasel could. What about the twins, one was Ravenclaw the other was your house” Draco said  
“Why would they? They didn’t know all these details about us. About the freckles, or the scars from Harry you have.” Hermione said  
“When did you say this book signing was?” Theo asked

Hermione walked towards the bookstore. The line for the signing went out the door, wrapped around the store and was still going. Theo and Draco were behind her as they walked towards the doors of the store. Suddenly the women began screaming. The three looked around, and Draco was instantly mobbed.   
“Oh my god! It’s Draco!”  
“It’s actually Draco!”  
“The model from the book! He looks just like Draco!”  
Hermione pulled the door open and pulled Draco into the store. Hope, the bookstore employee, walked over to them.  
“Oh hi, I didn’t know you were coming, this way, I’ll lead you to the front, I’m sure people will want to take pictures with you after getting their book signed” Hope said   
“What?” Draco asked  
Hope took his arm and pulled him towards the front. Hermione followed. They walked past the long line of people and saw the writer signing books.   
“Blaise” Draco said  
Blaise signed the book and saw Draco standing there. The women immediately started screaming when they saw him. Draco walked over to the desk where Blaise sat.  
“We need to talk” Draco said  
“Yes we do” Hermione added  
“Right after this signing. Have to give the people what they want” Blaise said smiling  
Before Draco could say anything, he was pulled back and then a group of girls were next to him. They had their phones out and were taking selfies with him. Draco was confused as what was happening. They women were grabbing him, and touching him in inappropriate places.   
“Stop that! Unhand me!” Draco said  
Hermione stepped in and pulled Draco away from the women.   
“No touching! No grabbing! No pinching of any kind! He is not here for you to molest and use!” Hermione yelled

Theo showed up and saw that it was Blaise who was the writer. He had his suspicions that it might be him. He saw women taking pictures with Draco and Hermione standing nearby.   
“Theo! You came too?” Blaise said  
“I was wondering who it was” Theo said walking up to him  
“Disappointed?”  
“Never. How come I’m not in the book?”  
“You’re in the second one.”  
“I am?”  
“Yes, It’s already written, heading to the printers and the cover’s been approved”  
“Do they know you wrote a second one?”  
“They will now”

Draco didn’t know why anyone wanted to take pictures with him. He was surprised at the brunette girl who was dressed in a school uniform. Her skirt was too short, her shirt was too tight, and she was pressing her body against his. He could tell by the red and gold tie that she was dressed up as what she thought Hermione wore. He noticed that there were other women dressed in what the book described as Hermione wearing.   
Hermione was seething, watching all these women rub themselves against Draco. What was worse was they were dressed as her! Hermione walked over to where Blaise was signing and pulled him away from the table. She dragged him to some empty bookshelves and quickly cast a silencing spell.   
“We are going to talk about what you did.” Hermione said  
“Well, we’re in the middle of the book signing right now. Can’t disappoint the fans. No magic in front of the muggles remember?”  
“Fine, when you’re done, we’re going to talk. Don’t make me get Harry”   
“No need to bring Potter into this”

Hermione walked back and saw that Draco was covered in lipstick kisses. She walked over to him and he seemed shell shocked.   
“What happened?” Hermione asked  
“You left and they descended on me like wild animals. I’ve never felt so violated before” Draco said  
“That’s it!” Hermione grabbed Draco and dragged him along  
She went up to Blaise and grabbed him by the ear.  
“Ow! Stop that!” Blaise yelled”  
Hermione dragged the both of them into the back room, and then quickly apparated away. They landed in Draco’s flat. Hermione cast a quick scourify on Draco, who still felt violated. She glared back at Blaise.   
“There’s no need to be upset here” Blaise said  
“Blaise! You wrote about us! Our most intimate moments. Personal details of our relationship and lives! How could you!?” Hermione yelled  
“I didn’t mean to. I mean I was just writing down what was happening because Draco wouldn’t shut the hell up, he was whining constantly after you broke up! He was so sad and depressed and I had enough! So I thought that I’d write the happy ending that he never got”  
“Blaise!” Draco yelled  
“You violated our trust!” Hermione yelled  
“I didn’t think anyone would want to read it, it was just an outlet for me. And it was so clear that you two belong together, you’re just too stubborn to realize it!”

Draco was in the shower, scrubbing himself after all those women descended upon him. Blaise was sitting there sipping some firewhiskey. Theo showed up a bit later and was drinking with him. Hermione had left after yelling at Blaise.   
Theo glanced over at Blaise.   
“So I show up in the 2nd book? Am I devastating handsome?” Theo asked  
“Of course you would ask that. Not if you’re integral to the plot or anything”  
“Yes that too, but do I get any steamy sex scenes?”  
“You’re the opposite of Draco, dark hair and eyes. Still rich, pureblood, but more quiet and reserved, you’re a wildcard that no one really knows which side you’re on yet”  
“Oh I’m mysterious too?”  
“Yes, you might give Draco a run for his money”  
“I highly doubt that” Draco said walking out in a bathrobe  
“Draco nice of you to join us” Blaise said  
“I swear, I’ve never felt so violated before, and I’ve lived with that noseless snake in my house” Draco said pouring himself a drink  
“I’m going to use that in the next book” Blaise said  
“You will not! You can’t write about us anymore! Granger’s on the warpath, and I never want to be touched again!”


End file.
